Bad Timing… Nothing Personal?

 “It’s just bad timing…. nothing personal….”

Umm yeah… it is. And truth be told, it’s the female equivalent of a guy saying “I’m just not ready for anything serious line”. And while persistence (and an Isley Brothers CD) worked in the case of Darius Lovehall (btw… I’m not sold that it was his real last name… I mean, have you ever come across a Lovehall? Ever? I think his real last name was wack like Wilkins… Darius Wilkins), the chances of it working for you may be as likely as a Love Jones/How To Be a Player/Soul Food sequel/reality TV/reunion show. These are the underlying things that “It’s just bad timing… nothing personal” means…

You're not 'cool like dat'

It is you. Let’s be real… if Idris Elba, or Ishmael Butler from the Digable Planets (specifically listed for my FBFF) or The Rock suddenly stepped to her, and wanted to get to know her during a rough patch in her life…. she’s not turning that down. So the reality is that the bad timing only applies in the land of ordinary, where the ordinary guy is likely to have bad timing throughout the duration of that woman’s next three lifetimes… which leads me to…

Forget what Erykah Badu says… there is no next lifetime. And for whatever reason it is, you didn’t get the girl. And by next lifetime, you’re feeling someone else and so on and so on… unless you come back as a snail or a goldfish. Then I don’t know what the hell to say to you.

“Love… makes things happen. You never where it’s coming from… you never know who ya gonna love…”  I am a firm believer in the notion that from a love standpoint, you tend to know the difference between someone that brings that spark when they step to you and the ones that don’t. And regardless of how we like to spin it… when it comes down… it is indeed a muthaf**ka. (Note: This only applies to single people… married folk… you’ve made your choice… this blog is just bad timing… nothing personal. :-) )

Know your role… and shut your mouth! Women have a pretty good idea of what they want with you within the first encounter. You can be long-term, short-term, friend zoned, or no-termed. Bad timing usually paints you in the role of short-term or no-term, so if you are lucky to even get to short-term with a woman that says that to you… just accept it and take it for what it is.

Be willing to let it go. If you really like someone, this is sometimes the hardest thing to do. You wanna wait until the timing is better, or talk yourself into thinking that it’s really not you personally… but let’s face it. The truth is that bad timing doesn’t ever mean they’ll be good timing. The timing will always be bad, because you’re not THE guy. This is not Martin Luther King… so lose the dream. Just let it go… and just walk away.

It’s just my interpretation… of the situation…. (Spottieottiedopalicious) What do you think?


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3 Responses to Bad Timing… Nothing Personal?

  1. Slim Jackson says:

    I’d say you’re absolutely right. Some of my women friends have done this to dudes or told me that was the case for a particular guy. Then some universally handsome (their thoughts not mine) comes along and all of a sudden they’re ready for love. lol

  2. Rebecca says:

    I think Darius did wonders just by keeping her attention for as long as he did (in the record store). I think that if a woman gives a man even a “committed” few minutes of attention (even before the “bad timing…nothing personal” line)….they DO stand a chance…but they typically fail at their own mission. Darius went into stalker mode after she resisted his advances — (in real life, this would have been a major fail) — but beforehand, the vibe he gave off captured & kept Nina’s attention…even when she walked away. Had it not, Nina would have never let him inside the apartment…she would have called the cops, lol.

    I think that at the start of an approach, (unlike Darius), most men are rarely thinking, “How can I inspire this woman? How can I reach her core? How can I make this woman view me different from the rest?” They’re usually thinking, “what can I get from this woman and how fast?” Because no matter how nice, how attractive, how smooth, or how witty you are…..that type of mindset reeks a strong, unwelcoming vibe most women can immediately pick up on. I can’t speak for all women, but whether “ordinary” or “extraordinary”…it’s all about the vibe I feel. Because as much as I love Idris, The Roc, and Michael Ealy….with the wrong vibe…I’m straight. Or in the back of my mind I’m thinking…. “what can I get from this man and how fast?” lol

  3. Kinghenry says:

    lol, i must say i just love reading everything here.There was something about watching this movie, some connectio. I agree with REbecca too,its all about the vibe you send out..and dudes we guilty of sending the wrong vibes albeit not intentionally lol.

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